Wednesday, November 28, 2007


Things not going well. My grandfather was back in the hospital this week. I'm really getting worried that he'll lose some more pieces off his foot.

Just had a huge fight with him. He's old and yes I understand he's taken care of himself for this long. But he's not doing a great job at it. And then gets mad at DH and I when we step in.

Then called his son, the man that donated sperm that created me. And I have to say that's the only thing that piece of sh!t has ever done good for me. He denied that my grandfather was his father, and hung up on me. I understand that he doesn't want to deal with the man. But the sperm donor will call my grandfather if he needs something. Makes me so mad. Not that I need the man's help. But it is his father, for goodness sake. My grandfather could use the help.

So the hospital released my grandfather. And I knew it was strange. When I talked to the Dr today, she told me she would only let him go if his regular Dr could see him in the next 2 days. Well, he came home with no appointment. So in the middle of the fight, he informs me, that he did talk to his regular Dr and she offered him an appointment for tomorrow, but he didn't take it. Talk about being angry again. I just don't understand why he can't get it through his head that these infections are very serious.

I take that back, I do understand why he can't understand. He's 81 and a man. Not to offend anyone, but he is acting more and more like a child. And for some reason it has fallen on me to be caretaker. I guess that's because his daughter is so busy with her family. And his son is a piece of sh!t. Really I don't what my grandparents were thinking when they raised those 2.

I hate to admit this, but I'm not going to fight with him every month. We have had the same fight the last 2 months. He says he can take care of himself, and I say he needs help. Next month, if this same fight comes up, I'll let him take care of himself and he'll have to go back to live with his daughter. I can only do so much. And I have had it up to here. I can't help someone that isn't willing to have help. I can't let this situation affect my marriage. I'm taking my frustrations out on my husband who is a wonderful man. He's taken my grandfather to appointments, checked on him at the hospital and just generally been there to help me. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have him.

I think it used to bother my husband that I didn't have a lot of contact with my family. But I think he's starting to see why I don't. My family isn't anything like his big loving family. Lucky for us we spent Thanksgiving with them. Those happy memories have helped me lot in the past few days.

I hope that I can get through this week. I need another vacation. Maybe I can talk DH into a trip at Christmas to see his family. I think that would be nice. (I don't think that will happen, but I can dream.)

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